{SMFH}

So as a silly girl, I caught feelings for someone. No, I wasnt in love but I liked "VA", he seemed like a good dude when I met him and got to know him. After a few months, its like who the fuk are you? This isnt the person I got to know, and actually like. So anyway he has been screwing up like crazy for the past few weeks and I deserve to be treated way better! So I started to distance myself from him, but then he is like "Tris come on" So I give in and continue to talk to him but Im still reserved. OKAY.... So this as$hole goes away to Italy last week to see if he can make a bball team overseas. I called him (& left messages) on friday and Saturday of last week, but he never answered any of my calls. We were supposed to hang out on that Sunday before he left. I had went out drinking the night before so I had a crazy hangover on Sunday. VA texts me "Hey miss lady, what are you doing?"
I respond "Im resting"
He replies "O Damn U are"
That was the last I'd heard from him, until this saturday while I was at work. What kills me is the excuses he always have! If your cellular phone is cut off, you can still use the pay phone to get in contact with me. Its really not that hard cuz if the shoes was on the other foot (Mine) I would've found a way to reach him. Its so fukin annoying to keep hearing excuses, I can take truth better than a lie. So he asks me if I would like to see him today, I say sure I have a few minutes to spare. I have to be at work at 5pm, however I have today off, but this motherfuker still havent called to confirm where we are meeting at. The games MEN play make my head spin, trying to keep up with the foolishness. Now do you all see why IM PRACTICING BEING CELIBATE? I would hate to give myself to a man to have him play with me, I'll be going to Rikers for murder. I think the best advice I would give myself, is to continue to focus on my writing career, and the other sh!t will just fall into place when its time.

-Tristan Jonez

Steppin' on toes

Im contemplating if I should really put people on blast... Let me explain. I try to be as honest as I can on here, and if you do something effed up to me why shouldnt I put you out there? This is the ONLY place I can be 1000% honest about whatever I may be feeling and NOT really care about someones feelings. Lately Ive been feeling a certain type of way, and I HATE confrontations, so this is where I resort to. I have to let out my frustrations somewhere! {Thinking} -Jonez

Fresh... Dope...Live...

So as you all know by now, Michael Jackson passed away on June 25,2009. It sadden me to hear he died, I grew up to his music, much like everyone else. Anyway I remember being a kid and watching his movie "MoonWalker" and you couldn't tell me anything. I was singing and dancing just like I was the star of the movie, If you've never seen it please do! In the spirit of MJ, Im going to post one of my favorite songs, "Dont stop til you get enough"
Quick Story, I remember being in the marching band back in Baltimore and we had a band routine (#1) and the cadence was this song. Every section came individually and as a group to contribute and to this day I still remember my steps. I've always loved how energetic we would would become when we were about to perform this. R.I.P Michael Jackson

[1st Verse]
Lovely Is The Feelin' Now
Fever, Temperatures Risin' Now
Power (Ah Power) Is The Force The Vow
That Makes It Happen It Asks No Questions Why (Ooh)
So Get Closer (Closer Now)
To My Body Now Just Love Me
'Til You Don't Know How (Ooh)
[Chorus]
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
[2nd Verse]
Touch Me And I Feel On Fire
Ain't Nothin' Like A Love Desire (Ooh)
I'm Melting (I'm Melting)
Like Hot Candle Wax Sensation (Ah Sensation)
Lovely Where We're At (Ooh)
So Let Love Take Us Through The Hours
I Won't Be Complanin'
'Cause This Is Love Power (Ooh)
[Chorus]
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
(Ooh)
[3rd Verse]
Heartbreak Enemy Despise
Eternal (Ah Eternal)
Love Shines In My Eyes (Ooh)
So Let Love Take Us Through The Hours
I Won't Be Complanin' (No No)
'Cause Your Love Is Alright, Alright

Gotta have Thick Skin

So Last night, I was talking to a good friend of mine, "Darnell", we went to high school together and we've been friends ever since(roughly four years), or so I thought. We were discussing my up coming new adventure (Moving to LA) and he expressed his displeasure at my choice. I was very surprised that he was upset with me about even thinking about leaving New York. I explained to him, calmly, that my dreams were to be a writer. I enjoyed the vibe of LA when I went there and knew in my heart, that that's exactly where I wanted to be. I explained all of this carefully because I know my leaving has been a problem for some people to accept, but Darnell? He had my back, when I first started writing he encouraged me to pursue my dreams, seriously. So I really couldn't understand how he could just turn on me! As friend you are supposed to show support, not beat me down. {Shaking my head} I couldn't even finish the conversation with him, I just hung up. I kinda feel like I hung up on our friendship as well.
I'm not going to let ANYONE, put more doubt in my heart or mind about my dreams. I'm sorry if you are too friggin scared to pursue yours, but don't stop me on my quest to fulfil mine. I know that to be in the entertainment business, I have to have thick skin... If his comment would've came from a stranger I don't think I would've mind as much but to be my "friend", that's something else. As much as my friends mean to me, I'm not going to stand for someone in my camp being negative. So yea..

~Jonez

SUPERSTAR IN THE MAKING

When I saw this photo I wanted to cry. This is my youngest niece Sanaa playing the violin! As you all know I dont have any communication with my "fam" but this made me actually want to reach out to her mother. I miss my niece dearly!!! I just hope that she doesnt forget who I am, and when she is old enough, she'll seek me out. I wish I could let her know that I love her always, even though Im not around!!

~Jonezz

"Bullsh!t"

So while I was on an hiatus from "Va" I exchanged numbers with an attractive guy. However I explained to him I wasn't looking for anything more than a friendship and he seemed to understand. The exchanging of numbers happened on a Saturday as I was coming home from work. "Bull" wasted no time in calling, so we spoke briefly that same night. The next day I went to work early in the morning but I had baby sitting duties so I didn't plan on going back to the bronx that sunday. "Bull" called however I was sleep so when I woke up I returned his called but he didnt answer. So a few hours later he called me back, we chatted a bit. He made it known that he was very interested and wanted more than a friendship. It kinda bugged me out cuz I was already explained what I was willing to give. So we got off the phone due to me having to make dinner. {Shout out to Tuwan} He called me again but I was washing dishes so he left a message this time.
"What's up Jonez, its "Bull", I hadn't heard from you so I thought I'd hit you up. I was thinking about you all say, I miss you, when are you coming back to the X(Bronx)? I want to see you! Yo hit me up when you're in my area."
I was literally speechless. I had already told him I wasn't looking for anything. I was 100% straight up with him, I wasn't playing any games with him at all. I was confused as to how he could miss me already, I'd just met him the day before. "Bull's" zodiac sign is a Taurus! I never dated one before and after this I doubt If I ever will. He is wayyyy to aggressive, next thing you know I'll be in the ambulance on my way to the ER cuz I didn't call him back quick enough. Nah Im sooo Good. He called me three times on Sunday and then twice on Monday before my phone died. I feel kinda bad because theres no possible future for "Bull" and I, especially since "Va" is back in my life. Im nervous to call him back cuz hes gonna want to see me and that's not going to happen. However If someone knew they no longer wanted to be bothered a phone call is the least they could do. ~~Jonez...

Seriously?

Even though the weather is gorgeous in NYC, I'm feeling so . . . Down? I just don't feel my happy chipper self. I'm not sure if it has to do with me racking my brain about the move to LA, me staying in NYC, my ex or just I don't know. I really wish my mother was here to help me make a decision! I'm so torn between the right thing to do and what I want to do. It's possible they are the same thing but how the hell am I supposed to know that? I don't have a crystal ball? Fukc!! Do you know how frustrating this is? I really want to call out from work today and chill in the park. Just to relax my mind! To NOT think about anything, but watch the birds and bees. To envy nature because their futures are already mapped out. Argh, well I'm on the two train now trying to mellow out to Mary J but my brain isn't trying to settle itself down. Someone shoot me, please!

-TJ
Sent from my iPhone

Decisions, Decisions

So Ive made the decision to stay in New York for a little while longer. Yes I do believe Los Angeles is where Im supposed to be but I know my mother's advice would be "Tiff'ny follow your dreams but place your education first." I can write & be just as successful in NY as LA. I want to graduate from Hunter with a Masters in English with a concentration in Creative writing. To me Hunter is a writers paradise, simply because of the curriculum they offer. I believe in myself enough to take the MFA program and do my thang. I remember reading Kimora Lee Simmons book "Fabulousity: What it it & How to get it", In It she writes, Even if you dont believe in your talents believe in what others see in you. Sometimes I dont see my potential or just dont believe Im that good. But then here comes a true friend to pick me up and make me see how talented I really am. For example, today I was a little bummed about my blog and out of the blue Ant* was like "Im such a fan of yours". It was weird as well as satisfying, like Whoa?!, I have a fan?? It was a little shocking to know that folks really come to my blog and actually read what I write. I doubt If I'll ever get used to that concept. Its kinda like opening your door to anyone & hoping they enjoy your cooking.
:: Clinks champagne glasses with you:: Enjoy your visit

~Tristan

Let's Play Pretend

As I was sitting on the train headed to work, a random thought was I hate gold diggers, male & female. I cant stand someone who pretends to have feelings for someone just to reap the benefits of that attraction. I cant respect someone who dates with an agenda. Why do you feel that person owes you something just 'cuz they have money or status. Society is becoming so obsessed with keeping up appearances Rather than living within their means. Yes I do believe that the cookie isn't free however I'm not telling you to go out and whoring yourself. I'm talking about if your dating someone, if you cook for them five nights a week they should at least buy you groceries. There's a thin line between being a gold digger and being someone who isn't letting someone else use them.
For example, I know of an older female (mid thirties) now dating a younger man (mid twenties) only because he's a professional athlete. You cant help who you fall for but if the older female sought him out that could be confused as gold digging. Personally its a fact that she only dates men who can finance the lifestyle she feels she deserves! WRONG!! If you feel you deserve a certain type of lifestyle its for you to make happen. Stop being dependant on others!
~Tristan J

So Saucy!

I took this photo in the bathroom of a bar I was in, but the crazy thing I really dont remember taking this photo at all!! I was sooo done!
~Trist

Fresh... Dope... Live...

So Last week I discovered and fell in love with Chrisette Michele. I've been bumping her whole album everyday since sometime early last week. I have a few favorites but I think "Blame it on me" and "Playing our song" are the two songs I cant out of my head!
> So Here's Chrisette Michele's "Blame it on me"

Blame It On Me - Chrisette Michele
Sometimes you can work it out…sometimes you can’t
Sometimes you’re forced to watch everything fall apart…its out of your hands
Sometimes leaving is easy…sometimes it ain’t
Sometimes it hurts to know the lovin’ you had is slowly fading away
You can say whatever you like
As long as we just say goodbye

(chorus)
Blame it on me
Say it’s my fault
Say that I left you outside in the cold with a broken heart
I really don’t care…I ain’t cryin’ no more
Say I’m a liar, a cheater say anything that you want
As long as it’s over

I ain’t a quitter…I just ain’t the type
I tried to see it through
I tried to make it to the finishing line
Oohh you thought it was meant to be
I admit…so did I
Every once in a while you think you figured it out...
Sometimes you’re not right
You can say what ever you like
As long as we just say good bye

Blame it on me
Say it’s my fault
Say that I left you outside in the cold with a broken heart
I really don’t care…I ain’t cryin’ no more
Say I’m a liar, a cheater, say anything that you want
As long as it’s over
Yes I love you but I really gotta lose you… freedoms where I want to be
Yes I’ll probably always love you but I’m over…I gotta do this for me
(repeat chorus twice)
Cause its over

...You ARE the father!

Hey I know I said I wasnt going to blog on the weekends anymore but today is different. I just had to say HAPPY FATHERS DAY! to all the men out there thats doing they things as dads and making sure to be in their child(ren) lives. I also wanted to send a special HAPPY LIVING DAY to my own dad. Regardless of the lack of a relationship that we have, without your sperm, I wouldn't be here today! (Laughing) ~Tristan Jonez

Maid in the Bronx? Hell NO!

So It seems as though, I've been mistaken for Alice. You know Alice, she was the maid in the Brady bunch family. I posted the before and after photos of an oven. I dont understand how anyone would be able to cook with their stove looking like sh!t. EWWWWWWWW!!! I refuse to cook anything with the stove being as dirty as it was. SO I cleaned it! And what a difference, two brillo pads, Awesome (cleaner) and a lil arm action make! For a second I couldnt even recognize the stove once it was cleaned. Seriously people, you should never invite me over your house, if it looks a dirty as$ mess because as you can see I WILL TALK ABOUT YOU! ~Jonez

Day Dreamin'

So I had a mid day cat nap, more like sleep, and I had the weirdest dream EVER! Here's what I remember...
I was in jail, Each house had women and men but they were all divided by a Plexiglas. There was some kind of glitch in the control boards and the Plexiglas was raised. I stayed in my cell but other people was going 'crazy'. The chaos lasted about five minutes, but I was transferred to another house. The guards was slow to bring my mail to me so I kept refusing to do whatever they were trying to tell me. I finally got my mail but there ended up being yet another problem with the control boards. This time some of the male inmates tried to bother me, I bumped my head, but someone (A black man) came to the rescue. When I came back to, the man who saved me was like you can never go back home, they know where you live at and will be waiting for you. I told him, if I cant go home, then where will I go?
The next thing I know Im in a house but with mad other people. I guess it was a home coming party? I still had my prison outfit on, so I had just been released. I went into my room to try and find clothes but everything had been cleaned out. I came out of the room to scream on whoever but I was greeted by bodyguards. I looked into the kitchen and Kanye West was sitting on the table. I walked into the kitchen but he didnt say a word to me. A bodyguard gave me some fly sh!t to put on, so I showered then change. I came back into the living room looking like a million bucks but by then Kanye West was gone. So I was ushered out of the house, but when I got outside nobody was there. My cell started ringing, I answered, it was a man claiming he was a Sony Rep. He asked a bunch of questions, all that I answered as best as I could. As soon as I closed my phone, a taxi pulled up, and I got in.
Kanye West was dressed in all white! At first we were both sitting in the back seat but then he ended up driving the car. There was another man in the taxi in the passenger seat but his face wasnt clear. So anyway Mr.West is like anybody who calls never answer any questions, people will say anything to get a good story. I was like oops, I just answered a call from a Sony Rep. At first he just looked at me, then was like no that was actually my driver, just to see how honest you would be, but NO MORE CALLS! I was like alright, I understand. We were just driving so I asked where we was going, he simply replied HollyWood, Are you ready?

The dream was way weird because I obviously dont know Kanye West personally. But besides that the destination was "Hollywood" do I take this as a sign? Since I indeed am moving to Los Angeles in a few months? Could jail be symbolized as my family? I guess it just depends on what I choose to be the interpretation. ----> Jonez

Blame it on the Alcohol

So Im working on going out more often, esp after work. I usually just go home to write, brainstorm or edit. Im 23 and I should be hanging out, doing all the things I want to! How sad is it to be mid thirties having a crisis because I was too busy taking my life to serious to really enjoy it? Anywhoo, my cousin called me to come out, which was perfect 'cuz work was stressin'. I ended up going to the whitest white bar in the Tristate area. Appearances can be deceiving because I had the time of my life. Since my cuz had worked there a few weeks prior as a shot girl, we got free drinks. I'm really not a drinker at all, so it doesnt take much for me to feel nice. I think I over did it at the bar, I had two long island iced tea's as well as a tequila shot! (SMH)
I can understand why there are so many alcoholics in this world because when you drink you have this euphoric feeling that nothing matters. For that night, I forgot about family issues, frustrations at work, dating problems, I put all of those things aside and just let loose. WHAT A FEELING! Im not going to drink like that again, cuz the sick feeling afterwards SUCKED! All in all I had such a friggin blast, some of which I don't remember! (Laughing) ~JoNeZZZZ

Fresh . . . Dope . . . Live

This song is the ultimate theme song, especially for me. The first line is "Going off to Hollywood to be a big star" so you know I rock the hell out of this track. Most times when you tell yourself you can do something, you usually do it. CAN'T is not in my vocabulary, except when people try to make me do dishes I simply can't do those!! (Laughing)

Jasmine Sullivan "Dream Big"

Dream Big - Jazmine Sullivan

Packing up my shh and I'm going real far Going off to Hollywood to be a big star There's nothing here for me so I gotta move fast And I'm getting on the road and will never look back (hey!)

(Chorus) I gotta dream big (dream big) cuz when it happen its gon' happen real quick (yes I feel it, I gotta) I gotta move fast cuz when it happen I can't let it go past (only get one chance

(Verse 2) Can't spend another second sitting on my mama's couch So if I dont take a chance I won't ever get out Some people talk but never do they just running they mouth But I mean just what I say and I'ma show what Im about Yeah

TIME OFF

Hey All,
Im dealing with a lot of personal issues & I think I need some time off from writing. I've tried to reconnect with family and it has me so depressed...

~Jonez

Keeping up with the Jonez's

**UPDATE**

Hey Folks, Just wanted to give an mid month update.

*As you have noticed, I've added "Fresh... Dope...Live" There is great music out there and I wanted to bring it straight to you.

*Next week, June 15 - June 20, well be dedicated to the ladies. Dont get tooo excited because its not all good. Im planning on touching on topics such as Married Men, Two faced Friends, Younger men, etc

*I may post some of the entries I write for "the saucy report" here.

*Im going to try my best NOT to blog too much about my personal life.... Sike! I mean that's why this blog was created!!

*I haven't forgotten, Guest Appearances. Im harassing my friends now to write something. Im trying to get three new voices, so look out for that maybe the end of the month.

Well that's it on my agenda for now. I'll keep you posted with any and all other news. ~Jonezzz

Fresh. . . Dope . . . Live

It hit me last night, while in bed to turn this into a new feature. It highlights my song of the moment as well as shine some light to songs that aren't so mainstream. Don't kill me if a song here is maintream! I will also, if possible, put up the lyrics. You need to know what you are singing along to.

Teyana Taylor "Complicated"

Complicated - Teyana Taylor

i don't know how else to keep it
so ima' keep it one hundred.
i didn't mean to get your hopes up
i was thinking thats what i wanted
kick-flipped the script on ya.
i bet ya never seen this one coming.
im changing up like autumn,
got you heated up like summer

[hook]
i cant say im not impressed with you
[but im not ready to invest]
i cant say im not the girl for you
[i just might not be her yet]
feels like all this pressures on me right now
[like i don't have a choice]
know this much--you can be sure that this
[aint about no other boys]

Cuz if it was anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone - lord knows it would be you.
[lord knows it would be you]
Before I see anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone - boy ima' come see you.
[something always brings me back to you]

Its not love but its something like that
It aint love but its something like that
Its not love but its something like that
Boy its complicated...

[verse 2]
now i can tell your disappointed
looking at me like we twisted
tryna figure out where my head at
everything i told you i meant it!
whatchu thinking that im feel real free now?
but im feeling something different.
you act like you don't understand boy, why don't you just listen?

[hook]
i cant say im not impressed with you
[but im not ready to invest]
i cant say im not the girl for you
[i just might not be her yet]
feels like all this pressure is on me right now
[like i dont have a choice]
know this much--you can be sure that this
[ain't about no other boys]

Cuz if it was anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone - lord knows it would be you.
[lord knows it would be you]
Before I see anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone - boy ima' come see you.
[something always brings me back to you]

[hook]
i cant say im not impressed with you
[but im not ready to invest]
i cant say im not the girl for you
[i just might not be her yet]
feels like all this pressures on me right now
[like i don't have a choice]
know this much--you can be sure that this
[aint about no other boys]

Cuz if it was anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone - lord knows it would be you.
[lord knows it would be you]
Before I see anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone - boy ima' come see you.
[something always brings me back to you]

In love . . . Alone

Dear Tristan J,
I'm ready to give up! I'm very interested in the guy I'm dating however I don't think he is as interested in me. We have been seeing each other for a few months but it's a long distance thing. Trey lives about Seven hours away from me. In the beginning we were seeing a lot of each other but I haven't seen him in three months, even though he may be in town. I've voiced my concerns and even told him his actions show he doesn't want something serious. Trey says this is what he wants and he is just extremely busy. I'm starting to feel like I'm wasting my time. Should I stay?
-Long distance sucks

Dear LDS,
If you feel like you're wasting your time you probably are. Trey sounds like he might want to work it out but his words aren't matching his actions. For some people long distances are hard to maintain without a great amount of trust. He may just be that busy that he can't give anymore of his time than he is. LDS, it's doesn't seem like you two are exclusive so you are more than free to date other people, don't just settle with Trey. You may want to keep your options opened.
-Jonez

Sent from my iPhone

Is anybody out there?

So I was listening to Kid Cudi, I heart him, and his songs make perfect sense. Seriously listen to "Man on the Moon" whenever you get time. Anywhoo, I was thinking about the move Im going to be making soon to Los Angeles. I realized Im scared out of my mind!! As you know I've been bouncing from place to place since I was two, so now its like drinking water, it comes natural. I guess Im so scared this time because everything is on me. Its like I know I want this to work out soooooooo very badly and if it doesnt, I'll have people being like "See I told u, u couldnt do it." I know I can!!! I feel like I've been preparing for this my whole life. Im not just talking about the move, Im talking about my journey as a writer. I just want this to work out for me. Im putting all my positive energy into and Im not letting negative vibes get into my zone.

And yea... I put up the photo of when I was on the plane just as a reminder that the sky is the limit. ~Jonez

Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater?

So the topic of discussion at work was why do men cheat? Obviously there are millions of reasons why men cheat but IMO lack of respect should be number one. If you have respect for yourself or your partner you wouldn't do it. I put together a list of some of the excuses that were given.

*They aren't getting what they need at home.
MY RESPONSE: Then make it work @ home, COMMUNICATION PLEASE?!

*Their partner will allow it - Take them back
MY RESPONSE: People will only do what you allow them to do!

*It just happened
MY RESPONSE: Stop putting yourself in those situations where something can 'Just happen'

*Their partners have limits on what they will do, sexually
MY RESPONSE: Then voice your frustrations, if your partner know you arent fulfilled sexually, they will make changes!!

*They know they won't get caught
MY RESPONSE: Everything done in the dark will definately come to the light. Nothing stays hidden forever, trust!

*There's no better feeling than sex with someone new.
MY RESPONSE: While that might be true, just stay single so you are free to date & sex whomever.

At the end of day the reason vary from person to person, however the outcome is still the same. You hurt the person you are cheating on, and if you care about them that should matter. I've been cheated on as you ALL know and I think that screwed something up with me, emotionally and mentally. So ppl, think about the long term consequences before you partake in the actions. Just because you might not get caught today, doesnt mean your free and clear.

------->> Jonezz

Sent from my iPhone

100th POSTING!!!!!!!

HEY PEOPLE,
Today I reached my 100th POSTING! I cant even express how tremendously excited I am about my blog! It seemed like such a long road to get to this point. Maintaining a blog is such hard work, especially while trying to write two novels and edit another one. In addition to coming to work from five to one in the morning, Im doing most of my work on my poor little iPhone. I have to keep the topics fresh, fun and relative to everyday life! I have to make sure Im staying true to myself as well as not getting to personal. As you know my whole life, is in the pages of this blog. I know that anyone can come at any given time and read what I have to say but that doesn't scare me, its liberating. I know its going to end up biting me in the as$ later on in life but right now its freeing. Im just happy that you all have gave me the strength to continue when at times I wanted to quit. So like I always say, My success is just as much as mine as yours. So... Thank You.

~Tristan Jonez

Fools Rush In

So the other day my cousin Taquia and I was discussing how it seems like people are rushing into relationships without really taking the time to get to know the person they are dating. She told me of a female she knew that got engaged to a man even though he wasn't quite divorced from his second wife. There was also an age difference, he was 34 while she had just turned 21. Just as Aaliyah said age ain't nothing but a number but if that man isn't taking care of his responsibilities as a man then that should be a red flag!! Why would you be willing put yourself in a situation that, from all angles, is fukced up? Now I believe in love and sticking by your man BUT you can date them. You do NOT have to marry them. Marriage is forever in the sight of God!! You can't get mad at your partner and be like it's over!! Sorry, your still married moron.

I've been officially single since November of 2008 and I can't say I love it but I'm dealing with it. I believe that my body is a temple, NOT a swing for every man to get a turn on. I'm naturally a relationship person but I'm not going to overlook key things that I know I don't accept in a relationship. For example, I have a few male friends that have been there for me so I'm not going to cut them off just because the guy I'm dating is insecure with himself. Let me finish... I'm willing to introduce them to each other and everything to show them that they are just my friends. I'm secured with who I am and if you tell me she is just a friend then that's what I'm going to believe until I see otherwise. I'm so focused on writing and making it work that I sacrificed my social life temporarily but I'm ok with it. I feel while everybody is out clubbing, I'm grinding!

I feel dating is the time when you are getting to know someone. It's like a test run, to see if that's someone you'd actually want to be with in the long run. Communication is mos definitely the key, if you want to date multiple people let it be known. Woman it's ok, to date as many folks as you choose to, just don't lead anyone. I'm a BIG believer in making it known what my intentions are and I love to get that in return.I can't speak for anyone else but If a man only wants to have sex with me, then speak up!! Now I'm not saying I'm going to want the same thing but maybe I could. A closed mouth will never get fed, so how will I know what you want if you don't tell me?? You can keep it funky (honest) with me but just be ready for my response. If the guy I'm dating said he ONLY wants sex, I would have to let him go because I'm not ready for a sexual friendship. I think before dating someone you should know before hand what you are willing to compromise.
-Jonez

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Baby Momma Drama

Yo Jonez,
What's good, how are you? I need some advice. My sons' mother and I have a decent friendship. We dated for about three years before my son was born but ultimately the relationship didn't work out. I'm an excellent father, I take my son as often as possible and we usually enjoy plenty of activities together. I do have a girlfriend who I've been seeing for about six months but I'm not ready to introduce my son to her. I wish the same thing could be said about my sons' mother. Whether it's a new boyfriend or just a casual date, every man has met my son. It bothers me that my son can't really keep up on who is who. I've told her that she needs to slow down especially with bringing all these different dudes around my son. She constantly ignores my pleas, what should I do next?
-Deadbeat Dad Never

Dear DDN,
I'm doing well thanks for asking. I think your concerns are good ones to have. It's understandable that you don't want all these random men around your son. It's a thin line because your sons mother may feel you are out of line to tell her what she can do however when it comes to your son there should be some kind of respect. You could schedule a time for just you two, to discuss the situation from your point of view. Explain to her how she would feel if the roles were reversed and you had a bunch of random woman around your son. If you feel like the decisions she is making is emotionally hurting your son then you can always go to court, file for sole custody and let the judge mediate the problem but that should be your last resort. I'm a child of the judicial system and it can have lasting negative affects. You see how crazy I am!! (Smile)
-Tristan J

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My War Scars

Hey I posted this on facebook earlier but it makes perfect sense so I had to relay this message here as well. Plus this is MY HOME so anyway. How many WARS are started due to {Simple} misunderstandings? Today I settled a mini battle with my fam; just by curbing my pride and making the first move. Yes I get tired of making the first move but I'm the type of person if I don't like something you have done to me I keep it myself. I just start to slowly distance myself from you. I internalize ALL of my problems, just the way I've always been. What's crazy is I can talk to you for hours without ever REALLY talking to you. I just felt like since I'm moving soon, Its time to get everything off my chest and out into the open. I would hate to leave on bad terms especially if the problem couldve been easily corrected with a conversation. -Jonez

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My Lil Adventure: The Devils Playground (Chuck E. Cheese)

Hey people, So as you all know I took my lil man, Tuwan, on a date. Tuwan is my good friend Seneca's four year old son, who I love dearly. He wanted to go to the movies so we ended up seeing "Up" and it's a very good movie so go see it! Anyway we had a great time. Tuwan got popcorn and I had nachos with a blue slushy but he pretty much drank all of my juice. After the movie he wasn't ready to go home so we decided to go to Chuck E. Cheese on 125 street. I will never go back there, EVER! It seemed like the kids were running the joint. I was scared to put my bag down for fear that someone would jack me. I know it's the place where can be a kid but. . . I'm traumatized. It just seems like when kids go there they turn into wild beasts with zero self control. Don't get me wrong Tuwan had a good time so any craziness I experienced was justified. While at the movies, he suggested that we go to the movies everyday (laughing) I suggested we go out somewhere every week. I'm off two days, usually, so I think I can manage that. Our next outing will be going to see A night at the Museum at Imax.

-Jonez

Btw I just had an epiphany, I can turn our outings into a new weekly posting on my blog. Maybe title it My Lil Adventure.

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Keeping Up with the Jonez's

Hey folks,
I know I was supposed to keep you all in the loop about what im doing but I forgot to give u the run down here.

*Im currently doing the FINAL edit of 'In the Moment' I really want to have that book published by DECEMBER 25. Sort of my xmas present to all of you who has believed in me from day and even for the people who didnt believe.

*I started working on books TWO and THREE. The titles are "Two Train Twist" and "With a friend like you". I started TTT as just an excerpt from my mind but I've been drawing an outline and I really believe it can become a novel, you all will def love!! WFLU, is FULL of drama at every turn.

*Im making the necessary plans to move to Los Angeles, but that wont become reality until January. So this may be my last Summer, Fall and Winter in NYC!! I look forward to it though.

*TristanJonez.blogspot.com, is going well. Im just trying to keep up with the demand of what folks would like me want write about. Im nearing my 100th Entry and Im EXTREMELY EXCITED!!!

~Jonez

Go Speed Racer

I literally just finished watching Speed Racer, the credits are still rolling, and I understand the true importance of family. Obviously not mine but the type of family that sticks together. I was captivated from the second the movie started until the screen turned black. I enjoyed that even though the 'devil' was trying to destroy his family, he stepped in and risked his life. And all for what??For family!!! I know I don't always have positive things to say about my fam but I always speak from my heart. I tell the good with the bad, even when I'm wrong I show that part of me. I paint the whole picture for all to see.

I cried today. I saw a photo of my sibling doing someone make up for prom with the caption " The best make up artist" At first I cried because that was MY dream, then I realized I was crying because I didn't have that family support system. I also realized that instead of being upset about a stolen dream that I should let that be my motivation. I've already traded my brushes for books, and begun on this amazing journey to find myself as a writer. So I honestly wish my sibling much success in her art and I'll keep striving for the very best I can give in mine. It's funny how my life's twists and turns are the foundation for every book I have yet to write.
-Jonez

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